Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Sandwich


A decade of married life and your wife can read your inside like an open book. One look on your face, and she knows if you are happy or sad. She knows what is being fabricated on in that workshop between your ears, if your heart rate is normal or not, if your blood pressure is high or low. In addition, if you are not doing well, she even has the medication for your ailment. You do not have to reveal her anything. She will find it out and scoop your problems out of you, just like you beat good behavior out of your lad.

Today when he came back from work, he had a stressed out look. It was apparent that he was not feeling all well. As he entered the house, she, that is his wife, looked at his face, and she knew that he was struggling to act normal.

Was it some unresolved issue from work that is troubling him? Was it the reprimand from his boss for being negligent and late as usual, or maybe it was that stern rejection to his advances from one of his young female colleagues, coupled up with some taunting and shaming by his friends at work, or was it the abuse he got from the local lad in the big car for driving too slow on the fast lane? Whatever it was, she knew that it was something serious.

He changed into his pajamas, walked lazily and slouched on to the sofa with a tired, weary and distraught look on his face, and asked his kids if he could change the channel to News, to which they hid the TV remote and enquired about his day at work.  He replied, “It was okay” and slouched a little more, without contesting. He had no energy left to fight for the TV remote or to give the lads their customary lecture on good manners.

She kept monitoring these events from a distance, and to break the monotony asked him “Shall I make you some tea?” He replied “No”. “Not even mint tea?” she followed. “No thanks” he came back.

Usually, by this time, he would be begging for food, or raiding the fridge for leftovers or stealing huge scoops off the pan under the pretext of tasting, but today he was all still. He was not even humming any of his usual Bhojpuri songs.

After a while, she asked, “Then, shall I get you the dinner? I have made your favorite Gatte ki sabzi!” The exclamation mark that she left after the Gatte Ki Sabzi went waste, as his reply came back as a curt “No”. Surprised by his answer and stunned by the tone, she looked back at him, this time staring in his direction. Her eyes began to squint, and her head tilted a bit to the right, her lips twitched, just like those possessed dames in our good old Ramsay movies.  The sight lines of both her eyes crossed each other, forming an X, which then multiplied into more X’s, just like one of those old time sci-fi movies, and with her X-Ray vision on, she went scanning his innards, verifying the pressure in his blood vessels and decoding the signals within his brain.  

Just a couple of minutes of this scanning, and she had diagnosed his problem. She came and sat next to him, held his hand in hers and said, “Drink this, all of it, in one gulp. Did I not tell you, not to have that stinky Parotta sandwich from that roadside cafeteria? But, you just don’t listen, do you?  What did you have for lunch today?”

Like an obedient child, he hastily drank the half glass full of bubbling antacid, gave out an extended burp, followed it with a smile and replied “Kheema Parotta Sandwich”.

Saturday, November 2, 2013

Onam in my memories


I do not remember what day, date, or month it was. I do not clearly remember how old I was too, maybe 5 or 6, but I do remember the events of that day and its succeeding day very clearly.

It was a rainy day, and on our way back from the school bus stop to our house, I had removed my raincoat hood off and splashed muck all over my sisters’ socks. The events that followed included an unceremonious welcome into the house, coupled with a lengthy and severe reprimand in Malayalam (most of which we did not understand) from Amma, especially for my elder sisters who had not taken care of their little brother while in transit. As my sisters stood in the corner making gestures at me which suggested ‘Let Amma move aside, we will make you pay for all this’, Amma  vigorously patted my head dry using a traditional Kerala thorthu, the intensity of which kept modulating in tantamount to the intensity of her reprimands. By the end of the head-drying project, my sisters were burning with vengeance and my neck ached terribly, but I smelt good. Amma had just applied a pinch of rasnadi podi on my scalp, neatly combed my hair and left for her chores as she grounded us for the day, and punished my sisters to read out loudly from their school textbooks. I kept myself posited on the kitchen window within safe distance of Amma as she cooked lunch, lest my sisters would find me alone, and hand out their retribution, which usually ended up with pinch marks on my thighs and arms.

Later, my sisters chanted out loudly from their textbooks, while intermittently checking for a leeway to vent out their revenge, I kept sulking, yet smiling as I gazed out of the kitchen window of our third floor apartment.  Down below, my local Gujarati friends were playing Chain Tag, skidding, sliding and rolling in the slushy, puddled ground strewn with cow dung here and there. That is when I saw Pappa zip in in his bicycle with the acrobatic alacrity of a professional bicycle stuntman.

It was just noon, and Pappa never came home from work so early. Usually by the time he came back, after his full day at office, followed by his part time work elsewhere, we kids would be sound asleep. The only time I saw my Pappa during those days was in the early mornings and on the weekends. That day, his speedy arrival, which comprised of deft maneuvering of his bicycle to avoid the potholes and dungs, followed by a skillful parking stint, a hop off the bicycle, swift locking and quick dash into the staircase well told me that he was today, a man on a mission. For a moment, I kept staring agape and wide eyed at the Hercules bicycle that he had just parked and then jumped off the kitchen window proclaiming loudly ‘Pappa came’ .

My sisters threw off their books on the bed, unlocked the main door and the outer steel grille with marked dexterity and rushed out of the house to be ahead of me in order to present their case about my misdemeanors and appeal against Amma’s biased judgment. I ran out too; all I wanted to know was, why is home so early?

Pappa rushed in, and informed Amma ‘The stuff has arrived. Pilla had sent a message. I need to rush now. You go get me the big vegetable bag’ he said and rushed into the bedroom leaving a pair of very dejected sisters on the main door.  I followed him monitoring his moves closely. He quickly opened the cupboard, and removed some cash from under the cloths in the top shelf, tucked it into the secret pocket in his pants and darted out of the bedroom, grabbed the bag from Amma’s hand and ran out. I wore my slippers and ran behind him.

As he was about to hop on to his bicycle, I begged ‘’Pappa, I want to come too’, in return of which he gave me a stern look that seemed to say: Move away kid, I am on an important mission. No time for kiddy rides today, but I persisted and eventually won my seat on the cross bar. I hopped onto the crossbar and sat with both feet on the left and clasped on to the handle bar, put on my raincoat hood and glanced upwards to wave my bye-byes as my Amma looked on gleefully and my sisters stared down, gnashing their teeth and fuming with vengeance.

The ride was a long ride, three and a half kilometer in all, from the Gujarat Housing Board Colony in Gorwa to the Main Market adjacent to the Vadodara Railway Station. On the ride, I kept bombarding my father with questions to get a clue of our assignment, but Pappa was busy and focused on riding the bicycle, just riding it as fast as he could. I knew I had to just keep mum and wait for my answers.

By the time we reached our destination, my legs were numb and I could barely walk, but it was an adventure worth the pain. Pappa parked his bicycle at the stand and ran hastily dragging me behind him, as if we were about to miss a train or were visiting someone on the deathbed with the soul holding on to the body just waiting to wave the last goodbye to us.

We jostled past the crowded market and finally reached our destination, nestled in between the kirana and masala shops, a tiny little 2ft x 2ft shop  that sold multi colored lungis, pure white towels and men’s undergarments. For a moment, I looked up to Pappa with a bewildered look on my face that asked, Did I come all this far, travelling on a crossbar, in the rain to buy underwear? Shucks! That is when a tiny baldhead with spectacled eyes appeared from under the table and called out ‘Ah Cheta, you arrived! It is all lying here, just for you’. That was Mr. Pillai, my father’s agent, and from under his table, he got the stash out. A collection of some very exotic vegetables that I had never seen before, some whole coconuts, plantain leaves, banana chips, Palada and Sharkara Uperi all packed in old Malayalam newspapers. Pappa gave him the money, which included his commission and we rode off, back to home.

On my way back, Pappa explained how difficult it was to procure our very own Kerala’s homegrown vegetables and other foodstuff and how he had arranged for these to be delivered through someone travelling on the steam locomotive train which arrived once a week from Kannur, travelling 3 days in all via Shornur, Madras, Vijayavada, Sholapur, Bombay and Surat. That, all this stuff was required for celebrating Onam, which was tomorrow. Tomorrow, we would be hosting some of our Malayalee friends who would join us in cooking and savoring an elaborate Sadya. My father was super excited, and I could sense that in his moist eyes and from the descriptions that he gave me about Onam. On our way back, we stopped at some of our family friend’s houses, where he informed with much enthusiasm that ‘The stuff has arrived, all of it. Come tomorrow. Come early morning itself, and don’t forget to bring the bottle’

Next day we celebrated Onam with much traditional fanfare. We Fraud Mallu kids conversed in broken Malayalam and although being Christians, we siblings applied Chanda kuri on our forehead. Elders donned traditional Kerala dresses. The men lazed while discussing Kerala politics over a smuggled bottle of brandy as the women cooked a sumptuous Sadya. For the first time in my life, I had food served on a banana leaf and savored the manna called Pappadam-Pazham-Payasam. Drinking Payasam off a banana leaf required special skill, and most kids really struggled with it; but we endured it to preserve whatever was remaining of our Malayalee identity. That was the first Onam celebration that I can remember of; that was somewhere in the late 1970’s.

This year, that is, 2013 some 35 odd years later, I found my little 5-year-old lad Yohan at the same point where I was then. We were in Kerala for our usual Annual vacation that falls in July-August. It was also the time that most of my cousins from various corners of the world landed at Kannur for their respective staycations. Whatever it was, it was not time for Onam yet; this year Onam fell on 16 September and by the time Mahabali arrived, we cousins would have left for the land where we worked for a living. Nevertheless, my mother had conjured up a surprise for all of us. Under her leadership, she organized the first ever potluck Sadya in our house. Each family prepared a set of vibhavams and for the first time, Yohan and along with him many young kids in my extended family had a full course traditional Kerala Sadya off a Banana leaf sitting on the floor. They struggled, but just like my sisters and I, who endured scooping yummy payasam off a Banana leaf many years ago, these little kids did too, and I am sure that, just like us they too enjoyed it.

Amongst all this festivity and commotion called Onasadya where the men cracked clamorous jokes and lazed over duty free liquor and Rummy, where women jostled kids running around creating havoc as they served food, I realized one thing. In all these years that we celebrated Onam, we never had all the traditional ingredients of a standard Onam day. In our celebrations, there was no Ghoshayatra, no Mahabali, no Pulikali, no Chandamelam and no Pookalam even. Nevertheless, we did enjoy it, and by God, we did enjoy it to the fullest. I guess, the reason why we enjoyed it most and carried good memories of it, was because we were in the company of good people; people who genuinely loved us and cared for us, and that, I believe is the most important ingredient of all.
 

 
That day, as I watched little Yohan having his Onam meal, I was transported back to my childhood, to that long ride on the crossbar, to my first Onam Sadya, to my little pranks for which my sisters always received the rebuke and to the memories that I share with my childhood Fraud Mallu friends, who are long lost in time. I wished them well, and hoped that somewhere they too were having their onasadya and reminiscing those good old days and wishing me well in return.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Ghareeb-ul-watan


Agar ghar mera zulmat se bhara na hota
Toh main bhi itni door dhoond ke roshni na aata

Magar

Jab itni door mein chala aaya
Jab anjaane dashto mein khud ko paya
Tab haqeeqat ne mujh ko pyar se samjhaya
“Ghar toh tera bhi beynoor na tha shayad
Kor tere hee ayn mein tha samaya shayad”


Abb yeh aalam hai kee
hum apne hee ghar mein hai mehman banke jaate
Aur padosiyan hamein hamare ghar angan khile phoolon ki kahani hai sunate

Hum suntey toh hai sub magar kehtey kuch nahin
Na aitrzaaz jatatey, na awaaz uthathe

Kyon kee

Agar woh Hubb-ul-watan hum mein jaga hota
Toh aaj Ghareeb-ul-watan hum na kehlatey.



Meaning of urdu words:

Ghareeb-ul-watan – Someone who lives away from his own country
Zulmat – Darkness
Dasht – Desert
Beynoor –  Without light
Kor – Sightless
Ayn - Eye
Aalam – Grief

Hubb-ul-watan – Love for one’s own country

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

The fabric of forbidden love



You have gone through me like a thread through the eye of a needle.

Now,
every little moment that we spend together,
every minute that we walk, talk and dream together,
we stitch this beautiful fabric with our own unique hue and color.

Now I am happy,
I like this beautiful cloth that we are stitching,
like a veil, it hides us away from the real world,
takes us far away to our own cozy little world,
a place where there are no boundaries,
where everyone worships one God,
where love is the only God,
and our love is not forbidden,
where you and I are one.

Now I am scared,
for we both are trapped in a world of your own,
worlds that are globes apart,
worlds that are not in harmony,
warring to prove that one is better than the other,
soon this beautiful veil will be a shroud,
confine us from the world that binds us,
destroy our world, kill our God,

stifle us, and with us, kill this love.

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

क्या थे और क्या बन गये वो

दुनिया बदलने चले है कर कर ट्वीट वो,
जिन्होने कभी मुहल्ले में आवाज़ नहीं उठाई |

दूर मुल्कों में स्पोर्ट्स कार चला रहे हैं फरररर से वो,
जो बचपन में थे इस्कूल से घर पैदल आए |

आज वेस्टर्न क्लॉज़ेट के सिंघासन पर अँग्रेज़ी न्यूज़पेपर पढ़ रहे है वो,
जिन्होने थे कभी वेस्टर्न लाइन के पटरियों पर माल बिठाए |

अपने कंठ पर डिज़ाइनर लंगोट बाँध काम पर चले हैं वो,
जिन्होने थी कभी कूल्हे पे देसी लंगोट चढ़ाई |

थॅंक्स गिविंग और हालोवीन मानने चले है वो,
जिन्होने लड़कपन में थी मुहल्ले की गटर में होली मनाई |

आज बॉस बनकर बैठे हैं उन लोगों पर वो,
जिन्होने थी उन पर बरसो राज चलाई |

अपने मा-बाप को गांव छोड़,  दूर बस गये वो,
जिन्हे कभी उनकी लोरियों के बिना नींद नहीं आई |

सुना है आज घर में बर्तन मांझ रहे है वो,

जिन्होने कभी रसोई में अपने मां के हाथ नहीं बटाये |

Saturday, July 13, 2013

You and me.

When you are near me,
It is just you and me.
Nothing or no one else matters.

When you are not,
I am lost thinking about you,
Looking for you, searching you,
Trying to find you, all around me,
In the books, in the songs on YouTube,
In the house, in my work,
In my stories, in my poetry,
in each piece of me
And then again,
Nothing or no one else matters.

It is just you and me

Just you and me.

Wednesday, July 10, 2013

The Night Before


Lying alone on a boundless bed
With a feminine scent all over my body
Staring at the smartphone in my palm
Hoping that something wonderful would happen
Something to break this monotony
A beep, a message, a ring perhaps
But nothing does
And so I wait.

I wait an endless wait
I fall asleep, with open eyes
I go looking for her, in the nether world
Faraway, somewhere in the mountains
Where she said she lives
In the deep jungles of my heart
Lost, in the vastness of my bed
I search.

I search, and then it rains
It rains, with thunders of her wail
and I am lost
lost gazing in those deep kohl lined eyes,
mesmerized,
As they burst like dark clouds and wet my face,
with droplets of tears running down my cheek
I drown.

I drown, as she pulls me down
Down into the depths
Into the depths of her teary sea, 
vast, sweet and salty
Amongst the rusted remains of many a shipwrecks
That tells tales of a similar love
Of love that was, at last found, not lost
Of love that lives forever
I rise

I rise, in love

In love, I rise.

Sunday, July 7, 2013

The Hickey


Do you feel like someone is crushing you right now?
Like a tight warm embrace on a night filled with snow?
Like your eyes are closed and you feel kisses on your eyebrow? 
Just like the sun kisses a sunflower, bright and yellow?
Like a kid dancing in the rain and spots a rainbow?

No, don't wake up,
don't spoil it,
don't open your eyes,
this is just me hugging you,
warm, cozy and tight.

And if you spot a red spot,
don't go grab an ice,
that's my hickey,

Won't you just let it last for the night?

Thursday, July 4, 2013

Talaash


Kuch yaad sa aa raha hai
Kahin dekha hai unhey pehle kahin

 
Kuch yaad sa aa raha hai dhundhla sa
Magar theek se kuch yaad nahin, kahan? kabhi?

 
Haan shaayad dekha hai kahin
Magar tha woh khwab ya haqeeqat, pata nahi

 
Woh chehra, apna sa, pehchaana sa lag raha hai jo
Jaise mile pichle janam mein aur bichad gaye ho
 

Woh pehchani si khusboo, woh muskurahat woh baalon ki silvate
Kahan se, najaane, kaise hamare zehan mein buss gaye woh

 
Aankhey bandh kar kay dil ki nazro se dhoond leta hoon
Shaayad mere dil ke kisi gali mein woh nazrey bhi mujhe dhoondti ho?

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Tashkees


Jab hakim ko bhi ilaaj samajh na aaye
Aur din ba din marz badhta jaaye

Jab bheed mein khud ko tanha paaye
Aur duur tak koee apna nazar na aaye

Jab din bhar kaasid ka intezaar sataye
Aur raat mein tanhayi lori sunaye

Jab aks dekh kar khud sharmaye
Aur chand mein kisi ka chehra nazar aaye

Jab bina piye he surur chaa jaaye
Aur banda waqt be waqt sher sunaye

Jab din mein karey raat ka intezaar
Aur har jhonkha hawa ka laaye khumar

Jab Sapno mein miley koee yaar gaddar

Toh samjho aap ke mareez ko ho gaya hai pyar

Saturday, June 8, 2013

My Mango Cheesecake

Exactly 10 years ago on this very day, that is, 8 June 2003 something wonderful happened. Something wonderful that changed my life forever.

It was a Sunday, and I along with my parents took an hour plus long afternoon journey from Nerul in Navi Mumbai to the Domestic Terminal of Mumbai’s passenger Airport at Santacruz. There, very near to the Airport, at the Orchid Ecotel Hotel in a nice cozy hotel room we met Mr. John Paul Moolayil, who was there along with his beautiful wife Mrs. Valsa John Paul and their only daughter who was still pursuing her final year in Architecture from Satyabhama University in Chennai.

After a brief introduction, the seniors reminisced their good old forgotten days, most of which they vaguely remembered and talked about some common family friends from their past life in Baroda which, was followed by a string of modest unidirectional bragging by my dad, which instantly elevated me to superhero status. Notwithstanding my embarrassment at imagining myself flying with my undies over my trousers, which almost ended up with me burying my head into my shoe soles, the chubby, bearded and cheerful Mr. John Paul who was dressed in a silk white Kurta and Kerala Mundu allowed me to take his daughter down to the lobby for a ‘private’ chat.

Down at the lobby, we stopped by the Cake Shop and picked up a Mango Cheese Cake and two spoons. We found a table in the corner and posited ourselves there. On that table, I found out that she had three names, Elizabeth, Thara and Unni and she found out the Sweety was not just a pet name! There, we also talked about our college life, our friends, our religion, our aspirations and the movies that we loved.

As we talked, and she narrated on how her parents conned her into making this visit to Mumbai, I got lost in those eyes, taking advantage of which, she proceeded with raiding the Mango Cheesecake using both the spoons.




That day, I don’t know if it was her used spoon or the Chef’s handiwork, the Cheesecake tasted awesome. That day I fell in love with Mango Cheesecake. Somewhere in the days that followed, I fell in love with that girl.

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Kevin’s School Bus.


After a few unattended calls to the School Bus driver, Kevin’s mother assumed that possibly, the bus met with an accident or had breakdown and so decided to drive him to his school.

She drops him at the gate, and before leaving finds out why the bus did not come today.

As she leaves the Admin Office, a visibly shocked Kevin runs out of his class crying and frantically running to the building exit. His mother intercepts him at the lobby and this is what he had to say "Amma, I forgot to tell you. I don't have school today"

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

A little bit of insanity


A little bit of insanity is good
If it gives me wings to fly
 If it takes me far and high
If it gives the world a better I


A little bit of insanity is good
If it brings in happiness and joy
If it posits a smile
And parks a tinkle in the eye


A little bit of insanity is good
If it binds my home
If it makes us one
And from us, it takes away the ‘I’


A little bit of insanity is good
If it makes me courageous
If it makes me carefree
And takes away my fear to vie


A little bit of insanity is good
If it pushes me to strive
To kill my fears high and dry
And put me on the podium high


A little bit of insanity is good
If it brings in more sunshine
If it keeps the wind blowing fine
And  kindles my stars to shine


A little bit of insanity is good
If it makes your tresses glow
If it causes my words to flow
And a poem for the world to know


A little bit of insanity is good
Yes, for me and for you
And for the rest of the world too
A little bit of insanity is good
A little bit of insanity is good

Sunday, May 19, 2013

My poem for feeling alive.



Treat life as a precious gift.
Live each day as if it was your last.
Reinvent a new you.
Give it all, go that extra mile.
Respect the people around you.
Become what your kids want you to be.
Rise in Love, do not trip and fall.
Thank God.
That is all.