Thanks Ma’am

DREAMY BOY - Part 8/9 – Thanks Ma’am

As the FB screen opened up, my wife walked in and dumped a large mug of tea on the computer table and commented “Started in the morning itself eh?” I replied back “It is not morning anymore. It is already noon”. She just let out a grunt and walked back to her chores.

The FB webpage had a nice welcome appearance that day. There were tiny little red boxes atop all the three little icons on the top right corner of my computer screen. There were friend requests from long lost buddies, few notifications and a message from a beautiful light eyed lady, two years senior to me at college. She had read my blog, which she mentioned was ‘interesting’, and wanted to know if I was based in Doha, and yes, if I was interested in joining our college alumni here. I replied back giving my details.

During the ensuing week, we started chatting through FB and I reminisced about an incident some twenty one years ago, when I was a freshman and only six days old at my college.

It was a routine ragging session and our seniors had paraded us down to the College canteen, which was one of the most popular evening time hangouts of our college, and during that time of the year a place brimming with activity.

The senior boys loaned me out to a bunch of senior girls ragging boys inside the Canteen. I was asked to sit on a table in the corner and was served hot tea.

As instructed by my male seniors, I just sat there straight, but looking down at my shoes.

Some four odd feet away from me, on my right, stood another freshman with his head down, dropped to his chin and staring at the fourth button on his shirt. Well, that was the instructions given by our male seniors. We were not to look up at all. Never on any senior’s face.

The senior girl standing in front of my batch mate asked him to look up, but he didn’t budge. When he didn’t lift his head even after repeatedly being asked to, she screamed at him “Look up here; into my balls!”  He lifted his head slowly stopping to stare at her breasts.

She screamed again pointing the ‘V’ made by her index and middle finger first on to her chest and then on to her eyes saying “Not here, you pervert. Look into my eyeballs. Up here, into my eyeballs”

I was observing the proceedings without turning my head and my eyeballs askance to the farthest possible point in the right.  I let out a loud chuckle as that senior girl passed on her final set of reprimanding instructions. No sooner did I do that, all the girls pounced up on me. One screamed “Why? Is it so funny eh?” another one went “Don’t you know how to respect women?” third one screamed “Don’t you have mother and sisters at home?” and someone else from behind added “,,, and aunties and grandmas….”

Needless to mention, I was finding it funny and enjoyed the attack, but just sat there still and quiet holding back my laughter, lest I’d get thrashed later in the evening by my male seniors who monitored my performance from a distance.

Well, I had committed a grave and unpardonable mistake by laughing out at one of my female senior’s reprimand, and so I’d have to undergo a punishment. The tea on the table had gone cold and so now was replaced by a fresh boiling hot one. As one senior girl dumped the tea glass on the table, she said, “Now drink it…….without touching the glass with your hands”

I bent down my head. The intention was to lick it up like a dog, to which she reprimanded me again “You are a human being or a dog? Is this how educated people drink tea?”

I lifted my head and gave out one of my best, most innocent and cutest smile that I had saved specially for such occasions. It seemed like her heart had just melted and she spoke “Oh!! That is so cute. I will help you. You don’t have to drink it like a dog. Use this” and punched a straw into the hot glass of tea from which steam was still emanating.

My ensuing reaction proved that I was a total dumb ass! I hurriedly bit into the straw and sipped in the hot tea. The feeling was akin to a bullet hitting my tonsils. Oh that hurt! Instantly there were fumes coming out of my ears and tears rolled down my cheek.

The bold senior girls got panicky with a crying freshman in their company, that too during the raging season, and so commenced the damage control. Someone offered me a glass of cold water, someone else offered to buy me a juice. Well, eventually I ended up having a large cup of Kwality ice cream.

My male seniors were furious for letting them down and I ended up getting thrashed left, right and centre that night. Back in the room, my batch mates and roomies had a field day teasing me.

That was one of the most fantastic days of my college life and yes, the apt kick off to one of the most cherished phases of my life.

My newest friend on FB blames old age and mentions that she doesn’t remember if she was, or not involved in that ragging incident and has further instructed that I should not connect her with this incident in any way.

I must mention here that girls from my college were very domineering and bossy. And there’s no question that I am going to disobey an order coming from that end. But well, I can always thank her for bringing back my good old memories and making another dull day at work look great.

So here it goes. THANK YOU MA’AM, firstly for bringing back all those good old college memories and then secondly for helping me to find my extended family in Qatar.

Few days ago I received a very warm and welcoming phone call and later emails from more than one of my college seniors welcoming me to the college alumni at Qatar. I feel great, elated and honoured.

THANKS MA’AM, for all that you’ve done for me, and that too before we’ve actually met in person (After those two years in college, of course).

J

THANKS MA’AM.